Friday, September 11, 2009

006 Rural Australian Computer Terminology

Thanks WT :D

Rural Australian Computer Terminology
A  little bit of Aussie culcha

LOG ON:                    Adding wood to make the barbie hotter.

LOG OFF:                  Not adding any more wood to the barbie.

MONITOR:                 Keeping an eye on the barbie.
DOWNLOAD:            Getting the firewood off the Ute.
HARD DRIVE:            Making the trip back home without any cold tinnies.
KEYBOARD:               Where you hang the Ute keys.
 
WINDOW:                   What you shut when the weather's cold.
SCREEN:                    What you shut in the mozzie season.
BYTE:                         What mozzies do.
MEGABYTE:               What Townsville mozzies do.
CHIP:                          A bar snack.
MICROCHIP:               What's left in the bag after you've eaten the chips.
MODEM:                       What you did to the lawns.
LAPTOP:                       Where the cat sleeps.
SOFTWARE:               Plastic knives & forks you get at Red Rooster.
HARDWARE:               Stainless steel knives & forks - from K-Mart.
MOUSE:                        The small rodent that eats the grain in the shed.
MAINFRAME:               What holds the shed up.
WEB:                            What spiders make.
WEBSITE:                     Usually in the shed or under the verandah.
SEARCH ENGINE:         What you do when the Ute won't go.
CURSOR:                     What you say when the Ute won't go.
YAHOO:                        What you say when the Ute does go.
UPGRADE:                   A steep hill.
SERVER:                     The person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch.
MAIL SERVER:          The bloke at the pub who brings out the counter lunch.
USER:                         The neighbour who keeps borrowing things.
NETWORK:                What you do when you need to repair the fishing net.
INTERNET:                Where you want the fish to go.
NETSCAPE:              What the fish do when they discover a hole in the net.
 
ONLINE:                    Where you hang the washing. 

OFFLINE:                   Where the washing ends up when the pegs aren't strong enough.
 
 

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